Sometimes the elements are just not in your favour.
You invite this cute brotha who has a crush on you home and he shows up…you’re glad.
He makes himself at home. Thankfully, there is light (electricity).
He doesn’t want to stress you so he requests for light refreshment while you turn the music up.
He looks at you lovingly and you smile and blush a million colours.
The atmosphere is tense. Hormones are flying up and down but you try to control it.
You engage him in a lovely discussion about hobbies and goals and he gives you rational and smart answers. He asks you same and says he is impressed by your diction and how neat your apartment is.
He commends your humility and you smile sheepishly like you cannot hurt a fly.
He says he is comfortable around you.
By now your wife material has stretched and you’re sure he thinks so too.
You can picture yourself in a white flowing gown with rainbow over your head.
Some time passes yet it seems like you’ve only just met. Neither wants to leave.
He moves closer to you and boldly lifts your chin with his finger.
You know what’s coming next and you’re ready for it. Your skin screams “yessssss, do it already!”
You close your eyes in anticipation…and that’s when Nepa deems it fit to take their light.
Not to worry, they just succeeded in upping the tempo.
Love stories are lovelier in the dark.
Where were we?
He seems unperturbed as though he lives for these moments.
Your heart is beating very fast and your head begins to spin.
Will your lips ever meet? You begin to wonder. The suspense is killing you.
He smiles and moves closer. Close enough to feel your heartbeat.
In that moment, there’s no one else. No one getting in the way.
There’s just you and your future.
And just when lips and skin are closing in, in the dark, with no one around, just two hearts in love trying to consummate…
You hear the bubbling sound of water coming from your bathroom. It comes on suddenly and goes on and on and on.
Confusion on both your faces.
You both return to your natural state on the couch.
He clears his throat and asks if there’s someone else.
Shock written over your face, you say no. You are as confused as he is.
He graps a flashlight and offers to check it out. You follow behind with a long wooden stick as backup in case you have to use it.
You help him navigate towards the bathroom, passing by the corridor, kitchen, bedroom until he is standing in front of the door.
Who’s there? No sound.
Who’s there? Still no sound.
It must have come from outside. Maybe the neighbours were dicking around.
You both turn to leave and there’s that sound again.
Still in the bathroom.
You move closer and closer.
The sound is coming from inside the bucket.
Whatever it is, was desperately trying to get out. Scratching and struggling.
You both move closer and flash the torch on the bucket. Two glowing eyes look up at you shrieking at being found.
A giant rat had fallen into your bathing bucket!
You push him aside and with your wooden stick, hit the animal repeatedly on impulse.
Die! Die! Die!
You scream while hitting it and pushing it back into the water so it grows fat from swallowing all that water.
It struggles to get away but the thought of how it had chewed your books and bag of rice infuriates you.
You hit harder and harder.
Its head cracks and blood gushes out.
You laugh hysterically.
Finally you have sealed the fate of the rodent.
No more nuisance. Hehehehehehehehehe.
Your insanity comes loose. The bloody animal helplessly floating on the water sets your heart on fire. You laugh and clap your hands, dancing as though you’ve won a trophy with the bloody plank still in your hand.
Then nepa brings light.
Apparently you had forgotten you were not alone.
His eyes are on you, not lovingly but accusingly.
That’s the expression.
That’s a side of you he had hoped to never see.
He turns away and rushes out the door.
You’ve killed once.
Surely, you will kill again.
He wasn’t going to risk his life by being next to you.
It’s still A Wonderful World Starring M*
Photo Credit: Google Images